AMAZING NEW TECHNOLOGY

I attended the Georgia-Florida game this year (as I had stated in a previous blog), but I was hesitant to admit that I had used some new space-age technology that I was introduced to by an engineer friend of mine. After much thought, I decided to go public with this and you will be the beneficiary. This technological advance allows one to place a micro-sized telescopic sound receiver on one's glasses and then one has but to face someone, no matter how far away, and dial in until the conversation is clear. In addition, the conversations are digitalized for recording purposes. The net result is that one can record virtually any conversation one wishes. So as not to draw attention to myself, I only used it two times ... before and after the game and here are the exact conversations with pictures.


"YOU SEE, WE'RE GONNA SCORE FIRST AND THEN WE'RE GONNA CELEBRATE RIGHT OVER THERE ... THE WHOLE TEAM! THEN WE'RE GONNA OPEN UP A CAN OF WHUP' ASS AND POUR IT ALL OVER YOU GATORS. WE'RE GONNA SACK YOUR HEISMAN QB SIX TIMES, THROW 2 BOMBS FOR TOUCHDOWNS AND GIVE THE BALL TO A FRESHMAN RB AND LET HIM RUN FOR ALMOST 200 YARDS ... AND WE'RE GONNA LAUGH AND DANCE THE ENTIRE TIME!"




"WIPE THAT SCOWL OFF YOUR FACE AND GET THAT UGLY BUNCH BACK ON THE BUS AND TAKE THEM TO SEA WORLD. AND TELL TEBOW TO STOP CRYING AFTER EVERY LOSS BECAUSE HE'S GONNA LOSE A LOT MORE ... THE BIG HOMESCHOOLED CRYBABY!"